Play Therapy Parenting Podcast Episodes

Listener Stephanie emailed me with a follow-up question to my episode titled: "'I Hate My Life!' – What To Do When Your Child Says This, Or Other Shocking Things" and described a few situations where her 7-year-old son reacts with shocking responses, but the...

A listener to the podcast emailed me a question regarding explaining dating and remarriage to young children. In this episode, I discuss the related topics related to this matter. - Age appropriate truth - Neutral discussions without emotion - Setting expectations...

Listeners Dan and Clay emailed me similar questions regarding "roadblocks" in the choice-giving process. In this episode, I discuss the following topics: - The purpose behind why we give choices - Hindrances to the choice-giving process (congruence, choices given only...

"Only acts of war and the events of natural disasters are more harmful to a child's psyche, than the divorce process" - American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, 1997 In this episode, I'm going to talk about the following topics, from a child's perspective: - Change -...

"When I look back, knowing what I know now, there were signs..." In this special episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast, I had the privilege to interview Jason Reid, founder of Tell My Story (www.tellmystory.org) and Choose Life (www.chooselife.org). May is...

As parents, we want the best for our children. However, in today's world, we are faced with new challenges when it comes to our children's mental health. The news is flooded with child mental health crises, and a recent survey found that child mental health is the #1...

In this episode, I want to bring us back to the most foundational aspect of parenting... the relationship. Using the 4 Pillars of Play Therapy skills is the best way to preserve your relationship with your child when you have to discipline or try to encourage...

In this episode of the podcast I wanted to talk about encouragement and self-fulfilling prophecy. I recently wrote a quote into my quote book that was the inspiration for this episode. It goes like this: The friend said, "Elsa, You have a wrong picture of yourself."...

In this episode, I discuss the dangerous intersection of social media and drug culture. Snapchat and Instagram are the two most common platforms for advertising and selling drugs. According to recent statistics, the overdose mortality rate for teenagers increased by...

One of the parents at my center sent me an article by Deborah Farmer Kris titled: "Your middle school child is the most amazing person." I loved this author's perspective on middle schoolers and wanted to give a play therapy perspective. The author makes four points...

In this episode, we receive an email from Mike, a loving father who feels disconnected from his 9-year-old daughter. Mike has been listening to the podcast and feels that he may have contributed to his daughter's recent struggles with anger, negative self-esteem, and...

I was struck by a story I read the other day about a teen who was heavily addicted to social media, and he went on a complete, cold-turkey detox away from social media. In this episode, I talk about the following topics: - The story of an addicted teen- The addictive...

In a recent Pew Research survey, mental health emerged as the top concern for parents regarding their children. This was a little surprising to me, considering all the other issues that face parents and kids, such as drugs, alcohol, teenage pregnancy, getting in...

One of the podcast listeners, Josh, emailed me and asked how to best connect with their baby.  Play therapy principles still apply in relationship building with babies and infants!  So in this episode, I'll go into how to connect and bond with your infant in three...

As a child therapist, I'm on the front lines of the damage that devices and social media are doing to our kids. The worst of all, in my opinion, is TikTok. There is nothing redeemable about TikTok, especially in light of what it's doing to our teens and young adults....

In this episode, I discuss the following topics: Three types of consequences: Natural, Related, and Unrelated consequences What changes behavior in children The goal of discipline

In this episode of the podcast, we will be exploring the often-controversial topic of spanking, by way of a viral video that I saw this week highlighting the ways in which some parents use excuses to justify their use of physical discipline. We will delve into the...

"Every day, in a hundred small ways, our children ask us...Do you hear me? Do you see me? Do I matter? And their behavior often reflects our response." This is a powerful quote by L.R. Knost that perfectly describes play therapy and what I'm trying to communicate on...

Baker Acts (involuntary commission to a mental health facility) are on the rise, and there are many things that parents don't know. In this episode, I discuss the following topics: What you should know about the process at the Baker Act facility What you should know...

I had a personal reminder the other day about how being outside promotes restorative sleep. So I tell that story in this episode, and then I relate it to how much kids are affected by simply getting some outdoor time, and how that helps the deep sleep cycle. All of...

We did it! In this 100th episode of the Play Therapy Parenting podcast, I take a look back (all the way to 2006!), and a look forward and where I'm going with everything. In this episode I talk about the following topics: The 4 most important lessons from the first...

This is a special episode of the Play Therapy Parenting podcast. I was invited to speak at a "Parent Huddle" at Discovery Church in Orlando, FL on the topic of kids and screens. I was given permission to record this talk so that I could share this with my podcast...

It might seem backwards to think that kids treat the people the worst, that love and accept them the most. However, most times this is true of our kids. It shouldn't surprise you that your kids, to various degrees, "keep it together" during the day, and then when they...

Acclaimed writer Stephen Covey said "Every human has four endowments - self awareness, conscience, independent will and creative imagination. These give us the ultimate human freedom... The power to choose, to respond, to change."  In this episode, I apply this quote...

Hang on! This is a deep dive into how your child's brain works, and I'll explain why they sometimes act the way that they do. This episode was inspired after I read an article on Brain Harmony and I noticed a diagram representing a pyramidal hierarchy of child...

I heard a quote once that "The good things parents do in excess, kids do in moderation. And the bad things parents do in moderation, kids do in excess." In this episode, I cover: Modeled learning nature of children Natural nature of children pushing boundaries and...

I recently got an email from Dan. Dan has been listening to the podcast and is in the "Play Therapy Parenting Family". He has been using play therapy skills and knows the "4 Pillars" of play therapy. However, Dan has challenges dealing with his kid's defiance. Dan...

In this episode, I talk through what to do when your children do not respond to play therapy skills. A Mom from Utah emailed me with some frustrations implementing the 4 Pillars and asked for my thoughts. I got permission to share her situation in this episode and we...

A wonderful validation of what I teach parents happened to me on vacation a few weeks ago. One of the tips in the 10-week parent coaching program that I teach is to get on a kids eye level. So I did that to a kid in line at a McDonalds and you'll never believe what...

In this episode I talk through baby jealousy when a new baby is introduced to the family. These concepts also apply to other situations when a new family member is added, such as step-children, etc. But new babies are the most common situation when baby jealousy...

We get it wrong when we interact with teens and pre-teens. At least, that was the main point of an interesting article I read this week. In this episode, I talk about how adolescence changes the dynamics of the family, and how we can make changes to the way we...

Most parents are stuck in a "prison". I've called it the "Parenting Prison". In this episode, I'm going to tell you what the Parenting Prison is, and how to get out of it. I'll also touch on repeating familial cycles of parenting. We often parent the way we were...

I came across a quote from a book that inspired this episode... "Although she hadn't seen her parents for years, it turned out that a parent's disapproval is a powerful lingering voice that shaped and defined one's self-image". So in this episode, I discuss parental...

Over the weekend, I saw a disturbing scene play out while we were at a bowling ally, and it was a perfect example of what I call negative behavior reinforcement using devices. So in this episode, I share that story, then I explain the reasoning behind why negative...

In this episode, I catch you up on, and celebrate some of the things I've been involved in lately, and then I celebrate an email that I got from a Mom... She wrote me an email and it touched my heart, so I asked her if I could share it. I celebrate all of the emails...

"The gratification comes in the doing, not in the results" - James Dean I stumbled on this quote this week and added it to my "quote book", and I realized how this ties into the play therapy concept of encouragement perfectly! In today's episode I discuss the...

"To develop normally, a child requires a relationship with at least one adult who has an irrational, emotional relationship with the child" - Urie Bronfenbrenner In this episode, I discuss how the development of kids is influenced by the relationships that they have,...

Empathy is learned. Kids aren't born with it, and they mainly learn it by observing adults displaying empathy. We want our kids to show empathy when it's appropriate. Being kind and compassionate to others is a good character trait. In this episode, I talk about how...

I was listening to a business podcast this week, and a successful Mom/CEO said this quote when asked how she overcomes "Mom Guilt" as she runs a multi-million dollar business, while juggling being a mom. She said "Kids don't count the hours that you're with them, but...

Have you ever told your child something about them that you know to be true, but they just don't believe it themselves? They could be smart, athletic, funny, etc. But they may have something emotional happening that makes them believe otherwise. In this episode I...

Do you often find yourself having to "step in" to control your child's behavior? In today's episode, I'm going to try to change your thinking about discipline. The goal of discipline is "self-regulation" on the part of the child. Otherwise, some children "keep...

When parents realize that kids need a different type of communication, it changes the way you interact with them. I discuss three sub-topics: kids are emotional, they do not have abstract reasoning skills yet, and how concrete "parameters" within conversations are...

This episode continues my parenting "Rules of thumb" series, which comes from the In-Home Play Therapy training that we conduct through The Kid Counselor Center. "When you focus on the problem, you lose sight of the child" is an important guideline to remember when...

Have you heard the (true) story of the little girl that went out every morning to get the mail, and the mailman greeted her with "Hello, Miss America!"  She ended up winning the Miss America pageant.  We don't understand the power that words, phrases, and expressions...

In this episode, a research study referenced on psypost.org caught my eye and I wanted to share it and talk about how it reflects what I see in the playroom at my practice and my interaction with parents.  In the research they make three points. First that executive...

In thinking about New Year's changes, or things you want to change in this upcoming year, I want to caution you about changing too much at once! "Don't Try To Change Everything At Once" is another episode in my "Rules of Thumb" series from the training I conduct...

Stop beating yourself up over things that you don't know! In this episode, I go over a concept that I call the "Parenting Prison". I'll explain what that is and how to get out. Next I discuss that there is no guilt or blame in not knowing something. Our parenting is...

I read an article that reinforces, from a medical standpoint, that social media is really harmful for our kids. A callout from the article: "Turns out the poorly regulated, 24-hour content mill of being Extremely Online is really threatening to our mental health!" I...

Did you have to take a career class... in middle school? Did you learn pre-algebra... in 6th grade? In this episode, I'm exploring the question: Are schools pushing kids too far, too fast? First, I read a letter from my son's school that was the spark for this episode...

In this episode, I'm diving into Birth Order, and how that affects your children's personalities. I'm going to spend a little time on only children, in particular, but I do give an overview of first, middle, and babies of the family, so this episode has some great...

Increased screen use in school, homework load, and lack of time to just play. We have always monitored our son's schooling, but this year, in his transition to middle-school, my husband and I were alarmed at how school was taking over our lives. I'm not trying to...

Do you say "Good job"? "That's what happens when..."? "If you do that again..."? I found a parents.com blog post titled "10 Things You Should Never Say to Your Kids", and I compare several of the "things" in this post to my 2011 post titled "10 Things Not To Say To...

Have you ever second-guessed yourself as a parent? Do you ever feel like you are not as successful as you want to be in your parenting? In this episode we look at three common "red flags" that might make you think you're failing, but are actually an indicator of...

Do you wonder if your parenting style is helpful or harmful to your children's long-term well being? In this episode, we look at the characteristics of the Authoritative Parenting Style, which is categorized by high levels of both demandingness and responsiveness. We...

If you have a young child between, say, 5 and 11, you've probably heard something shocking come out of their mouth like "I hate my life", or "I wish I were never born". In this episode of the podcast, I talk about how most parents respond in one of three ways. Then I...

If you follow this podcast, you know that I teach fundamentals and foundational parenting skills from a play therapy perspective. I do like to keep my "finger on the pulse" of parenting, and I search what's going on in the parenting world every so often.  For a long...

In this episode, I discuss a story about a Dad that does something "revolutionary"... he tried something new to help his son's tantrums and meltdowns.

Are you concerned that your kids spend too much time on devices? Do you wonder if there's a happy medium between no enough and too much? In this episode of the Play Therapy Podcast, I discuss these questions, plus... The America Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) guidelines...

In this episode I talk about my own "Field of Dreams" story. If you know me well, you'd know that I'm a huge baseball fan, and recently, the "Field of Dreams" game was played between the Yankees and White Sox played on the corn field from the movie. It reminded me...

This is a special episode of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast. I was invited to give a training/presentation to the 300, or so, school and guidance counselors from the Hillsborough County School System on Play Therapy techniques. So during this hour training, they...

I wonder how often you get frustrated when your child responds with one-word answers. (See what I did there?) Using "I wonder" statements with your children is one of the greatest techniques that play therapists use to interact with kids on their emotional level to...

In this episode, I comment on a blog post I saw on todaysparent.com that I couldn't ignore. "I love my kids, but I don’t like parenting—and I know I’m not alone".  So I'll unpack my thoughts on that by first exploring my opinion that many parents may feel like this...

This is a continuation of the "Rules of Thumb" series from the Child-Parent Relationship Therapy curriculum, which is the core training used in my In-Home Play Therapy program. "Encourage the effort rather than praise the product". Encouragement is probably the most...

You will never know what your child is capable of unless you allow them to try! I know it's hard to watch your child struggle with something, like opening lids on a jar, or tying their shoes, or trying to pack and lug around their sports bag, but did you know that...

We are a month into summer... are your kids driving you nuts? It could be that you need to add some structure back into your kids lives to prevent behavior issues. In this episode, I talk to you about the importance of structure and schedule in kid's lives, I give you...

This is a continuation of the "Rules of Thumb" series from the Child-Parent Relationship Therapy curriculum, which is the core training used in my In-Home Play Therapy program. "You can’t give away what you do not possess." is a reminder that you need to be good to...

Another Memorial Day weekend observation... I couldn't believe how many families were at our hotel (poolside, restaurant, lobby, etc.) all ignoring each other, with their faces glued to their "Digital Pacifiers!" The use by both adults and children was alarming. We...

While my family was on a weekend getaway over Memorial Day weekend, I couldn't help but do some people watching while I was sitting by the pool, reading a book. I witnessed a perfect example of why it's futile to reason with a kid (a 4 year old, at that!) In this...

"We are certain to make mistakes, but we can recover. It is how we handle our mistakesthat makes the difference." This is such a great rule-of-thumb from the Child-Parent Relationship Therapy training that is the curriculum in my In-Home Play Therapy program. In this...

This is my 50th episode! I'm so grateful to my podcast listeners. In this episode, I'm looking back on my week's observation of the "Parenting Journey". Parenting is full of ups and downs, but we are all united in a goal of being the best parent we can be. We want...

One of the most important things we can do for our kids to cherish the relationship that we have with them. In this episode, I talk about a Rule of Thumb from the Child-Parent Relationship Training, “Focus on the Donut, Not the Hole.” We look at the importance of...

In this episode of the podcast, I talk about the natural consequence of child behavior. There are three points that I'd like to share with you regarding natural consequences. The first is that children are not rational. Next is that the natural consequence is...

One of the "Rules of Thumb" that we teach you in the In-Home Play Therapy program is this concept of "When a child is drowning, don’t try to teach them to swim." In this podcast, I discuss why it is so important to remember that children don't have abstract reasoning...

We all know that therapy is beneficial and that positive change is associated with the process. But what can you count on in terms of areas of growth when a child participates in play therapy? There are four universal outcomes of play therapy, regardless of what the...

Often people assume that if talk therapy works with adults, it should work with kids, too. But have you ever asked your child a question about how they feel or why they did something and gotten, “I don’t know” or a blank stare with a shrug? In this episode, I talk...

Do you know what your kids are doing on social media? Do you REALLY know? I work with a lot of pre-teens and teens every week, with debilitating personal issues. One of the common threads I see is social media use. If you really care about your kids, it's time to stop...

Cutting: What You Need to Know as a Parent. Why kids are doing it. How they are finding out about it. How they are hiding it. How they are sharing it. What you can do about it.

You probably haven't heard many people talking about how badly our kids are absorbing the "adult response to the coronavirus". No one is really addressing it. The phones at my office are ringing off the hook with desperate parents trying to get help for their anxious...

Often one of the underlying causes of emotional and behavioral struggles is that who the child wants to be (their "ideal self") is very different from who they are (their "actual self"). In this podcast exclusive, I share what happens in the playroom when a child is...

Parents are often concerned when children express angry or aggressive behavior. In this podcast exclusive I discuss how parents can recognize the deeper emotions driving the angry, aggressive behavior. Once you understand why kids default to anger, you will be able to...

Have you ever wondered if all the work you put into learning how to be a good parent is paying off? Have you noticed that the more consistent you are with applying your parenting skills, that you surprise yourself by how well you handle behavior situations with your...

Are you setting goals or resolutions for the new year? If so, is one to create a better relationship with your kids? Or to parent in a kinder way? In this episode, I share two main goals for 2021 that can start you off on the right foot in how you interact with your...

Are you loving your kids in the way that they feel love? You might be completely wasting your efforts in showing love to your kids, unless you are speaking their "language!" In this episode, I introduce you to the 5 Love Languages of Kids, so that you can know for...

We know that kids don’t come with an instruction manual and parenting doesn’t have a road map. That often leaves us confused, defeated, frustrated, and ashamed of our failures. It doesn’t have to be that way! This episode highlights a question that I ask myself almost...

Is your child's behavior at school creating stress and anxiety in your family? Do you fear daily reports from the teacher? Are you unsure how to handle what's going on when you talk to the teacher or staff? I've helped many families navigate this issue in my private...

Have you ever felt helpless to handle your children’s anxiety and worries? Have you tried things that didn’t seem to help? Do you want nothing more than to see your kids happy and worry free? With the sharp increase in child anxiety levels this year, it’s important to...

Do you wonder if some of your children’s behaviors are related to anxiety? Have you seen an increase in big emotions, worry, fear, or confusion? Is one of the unforeseen fallouts of 2020 that our kids are experiencing increased anxiety? If the phone calls to my office...

Have you ever felt that your kids are too impulsive? Do they get out of control when they are overly excited? Are they quick to melt down when they don’t get their way? Does their behavior seem reckless sometimes? A good predictor of adult success is how well a child...

You probably hate it when your child loses it when they get upset! But do you know what's going on in their brain when they have that reaction? In this episode, I explain the results from a study that reveals when a child says, "I'm angry," it decreases the emotional...

Kids say things that often lead us to the wrong conclusions about what is going on. A Yale study reveals how much our feelings influence what we think and do, especially children! This episode dives into the trick that helps us get to the heart of the emotion that our...

Have you ever tried to explain to your child why something they did wasn't a good idea? We've all done it. But here's the problem... kids aren't rational until about 12 or 13, so you're wasting your time explaining things rationally to them. Kids are emotional and...

One of the key practices in Play Therapy is figuring out the emotion behind the behavior. When you know what emotion is causing a child to act a certain way, you can then reflect that feeling back to them and often diffuse any behavior issues. In this episode, I...

Kids under 13 do not have rational thought, yet parents try to rationalize with their kids during discipline. This is completely futile! Kids are emotional, so it’s more effective to meet them in their emotion, reflect their feeling, and if you impart some...

In this episode of Play Therapy Parenting®, Dr. Brenna discusses how the American Academy of Pediatrics published their “best of” 2019 journal articles, and one of the studies explores prescribing PLAY to combat all the stress, busyness, and anxiety that kids are...

In this episode of Play Therapy Parenting®, Dr. Brenna shares a parenting tip from her private parent coaching class (Child Parent Relationship Therapy [CPRT]) "Be a thermostat, not a thermometer” is a metaphor that teaches you how to RESPOND to your kids, instead of...

In this episode of Play Therapy Parenting®, Dr. Brenna just offers some encouragement during this time of unknown. As you adjust to this “new normal”, and with kids doing school from home, and you possibly working from home, hopefully, we can reflect on some good...

In this episode of Play Therapy Parenting®, Dr. Brenna discusses the involuntary committing of minors (known as “Baker Acting” in Florida) to mental health facilities. Unfortunately, many parents are unaware of what this process looks like, and how traumatic of an...

In this episode of Play Therapy Parenting®, Dr. Brenna discusses how the root of many, if not most, behavioral issues with kids is Power Struggles. Learn what causes the power struggles and how to eliminate them with your kids.Podcast Transcript Hi, I’m Dr Brenna...

In this episode of Play Therapy Parenting®, Dr. Brenna shares a story of a Mom who has taken Brenna’s private parenting coaching, using the Reflecting Feelings skill. Normally, this Mom uses Reflecting Feelings on her 4 year old, but an opportunity came up to use it...