S3E1 – Parent Companion for Play Therapy: New Series Intro & Adulthood Bias- Why Parents Misunderstand Their Kids

I’m excited to kick off Season 3 of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast! This series is called Parent Companion for Play Therapy, and it’s designed both for parents whose children are in play therapy and for any parent who wants to better understand their kids. Whether you’re navigating the therapy process or simply looking for a new perspective at home, these episodes will give you clarity, confidence, and practical ways to connect with your child.

In this first episode, I introduce the series and dive into one of the most important concepts: Adulthood Bias. This happens when we interpret children’s behavior through our adult lens of logic, reasoning, and expectations. But kids don’t process the world the way we do — they act and react from feelings, not logic. I share real-life examples of how Adulthood Bias shows up and explain how shifting our mindset helps us respond with curiosity and connection instead of frustration. This mindset shift is the foundation for everything else we’ll cover this season.

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Parent Companion for Play Therapy: Introducing Season 3

Welcome to Season 3 of the Play Therapy Parenting Podcast! I’m so excited to begin this new journey with you. This season is called Parent Companion for Play Therapy, and it has one clear purpose: to give parents clarity, confidence, and support while their children are in play therapy — and to give all parents a new way of understanding their kids.

Even if your child isn’t in therapy, you’ll find that the ideas we cover this season are powerful tools for connecting with your children, seeing their behavior in a new light, and shifting how you respond as a parent.

Why This Series Matters

So many child-centered play therapists have been referring parents to this podcast. Along the way, it became clear that parents need more than just information — they need reassurance and understanding.

• If your child is in therapy, this season will help you feel more confident about the process and give you the clarity you need to fully support your child.
• If your child is not in therapy, these same ideas will give you a fresh perspective on behavior and emotions, helping you relate to your child in new and meaningful ways.

My dual goal for this season is simple:

1. To help parents move away from control and toward connection.
2. To help parents move away from correction and toward understanding.

What to Expect This Season

Here’s a preview of what we’ll be covering together:

• Foundations: Why play therapy works, what therapists do, and how to see behavior as communication.
• Common Challenges: Anxiety, aggression, power struggles, self-esteem, and other issues nearly every family faces.
• Parent Insights: Memorable concepts like the Anger Iceberg, the Peach Tree, and Waffles & Spaghetti — tools to help you better understand your child’s world.
• Growth Over Time: How change unfolds in therapy, and how these same principles can help kids thrive at home.

Each episode stands alone, so you can listen in order or pick what matters most to your family right now. Together, they form a complete picture of your child’s journey and your role as a parent.

Introducing the First Concept: Adulthood Bias

To launch the season, we start with one of the most important ideas: Adulthood Bias.

Adulthood Bias is what happens when we look at children’s behavior through our adult lens of logic, reasoning, and expectations. It’s natural — but it’s also misleading, because children don’t process the world like we do.

Adults think with reasoning and logic. Children act from feelings and experiences. Their brains are still developing, and they don’t yet have the cognitive ability to explain or reason through what they’re feeling. That’s why we can’t lecture or reason kids into behaving differently.

Everyday Examples of Adulthood Bias

Here are some simple examples of how Adulthood Bias shows up:

• Spilled Drink: Parents think, “You weren’t being careful.” But the child wasn’t thinking about “carefulness” at all — there was no reasoning involved.
• Leaving the Playground: Parents think, “You’re being disrespectful.” But the child is only focused on losing fun, not on being defiant.
• Sibling Conflict: Parents think, “You know that’s wrong.” But hitting or lashing out is an emotional overflow, not a moral choice.

When we interpret behavior through our adult lens, we miss what’s really happening underneath.

Shifting Our Mindset

The key is not to criticize ourselves for falling into Adulthood Bias — it’s natural. The shift comes when we change how we interpret behavior:

• Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with you?” → ask yourself, “What are they trying to show me?”
• Instead of assuming intent → assume expression.

Children aren’t manipulative or willfully defiant. They’re expressing big feelings they don’t yet have words for. Our role as parents is to meet them where they are, not demand that they meet us where we are.

Why This Matters in Parenting and Therapy

• In therapy, behavior is never misbehavior — it’s communication.
• At home, when parents drop Adulthood Bias, frustration shifts to curiosity.
• With curiosity comes understanding, and with understanding comes connection.

Relationship and connection is what drives growth, healing, and lasting change.

Final Thoughts

This is why Season 3 begins here. Adulthood Bias is the foundation for everything else we’ll cover. Once we let go of our adult interpretations, we’re free to see our kids as they really are — and that’s where growth begins.

I’m thrilled to dive deeper into this series with you. In the next episode, we’ll talk about why child-centered play therapy works and what makes it so effective for children.

Until then, try this week to notice when Adulthood Bias shows up in your parenting, and make that mental swap. Instead of “What’s wrong with you?” ask yourself, “What are they showing me?” You’ll be amazed at how it changes the relationship.