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June 5, 2025

S2E43 - My Child Hits Himself and Says He's Bad—What Do I Do?

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Episode summary

In this episode, I respond to a question from Whitney about her six-year-old son's negative self-talk and self-harming behaviors—things like calling himself "stupid" or hitting himself after making a mistake. I explain why these behaviors are often rooted in low self-esteem, anxiety, and low frustration tolerance—and why it's not about attention or defiance, but maladaptive coping.

I walk through how to set clear, compassionate limits on self-harm while offering healthy alternatives for emotional release. I also share how to support his self-concept through encouragement and provide access to over 100 esteem-building phrases to use at home. If your child has ever melted down in shame or seemed harsh with themselves, this episode offers both understanding and a path forward.