S2E43 – My Child Hits Himself and Says He’s Bad—What Do I Do?

Jun 5, 2025

In this episode, I respond to a question from Whitney about her six-year-old son’s negative self-talk and self-harming behaviors—things like calling himself “stupid” or hitting himself after making a mistake. I explain why these behaviors are often rooted in low self-esteem, anxiety, and low frustration tolerance—and why it’s not about attention or defiance, but maladaptive coping.

I walk through how to set clear, compassionate limits on self-harm while offering healthy alternatives for emotional release. I also share how to support his self-concept through encouragement and provide access to over 100 esteem-building phrases to use at home. If your child has ever melted down in shame or seemed harsh with themselves, this episode offers both understanding and a path forward.

Episode links:
101+ Encouragement Phrases – Watch the video and download the list!
https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/101-encouragement-phrases/

Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: [email protected]
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Common Play Therapy References:
Cochran, N., Nordling, W., & Cochran, J. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy (1st ed.). Wiley.
VanFleet, R., Sywulak, A. E., & Sniscak, C. C. (2010). Child-centered play therapy. Guilford Press.
Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge.
Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group.
Benedict, Helen. Themes in Play Therapy. Used with permission to Heartland Play Therapy Institute.

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